The Rumour Mill

 

The transfer window has creaked open, yet an eerie, almost spectacular calm has descended upon cyberspace. It is a disorienting tragedy; perhaps times truly are changing now that our premier chaos merchant, David Sullivan, is no longer presiding as chairman (an era of market-stall haggling that usually involved at least one broken fax machine and a confusingly high number of strikers).

According to the digital whispers of @ExWHUEmployee, the club is set to announce Steve Nickson as head of recruitment. Delightfully, Nickson boasts a fabulous working relationship with Amanda Staveley, who is rumoured to be eyeing up shares. High finance meets East End reality; a glorious mix of corporate glamour and soggy stadium pies. Magnificent.

Naturally, the vultures are circling. The Mancs are playing it cool over Mateus Fernandes, while Spurs have made a polite little enquiry of their own. Predictable.

Closer to home, Daniel Křetínský is making waves with plans for a state-of-the-art training facility. The current, tragic Portakabins... which have long personified structural despair and damp-induced melancholy... are screaming in protest. Inexplicably, key players have vowed to stay. It is all terribly civilized. I find myself beautifully confused by this sudden competence, though I am well aware it is a classic West Ham move to lure the faithful into a false sense of security before the inevitable, spectacular collapse. 

Fortune's hiding, but for now, we remain underground. Massive.